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A Time Like No Other

I had a foundation. I was confident. I was sure of who I was in the world. I knew pretty much where I was going, and how I was going to get there.

But then my Mother died.

That sounds sudden and harsh, but her death to me was sudden and harsh. Now in these days after, I’m left in a swirl of dust, sometimes feeling that I don’t know which way is up. I thought I knew my place in the world energetically, but when my Mom left my world, it felt as though my foundation had shattered and collapsed. And the most surprising part is that I had no idea she was such a foundation for me.

It’s not that I was defined by my mother, but she created a safe haven for me that subtly gave me a firm place on which to stand. I know that she is still there for me etherically, but my mind tells me that that really isn’t the same thing. My interpretation of my existence in this world was held up, unknowingly, by her physical presence.

Me and Mom

Perhaps this is the effect of a mother-child relationship, as our mothers are those that gave us a safe place to grow in their wombs and then furthered our growth once we showed up as little babies. Even though I was blessed to have an exquisite relationship with my Mom, I think this principle could hold true for all parental relationships.

So here I am, left to find the ground and my center again. But this time on my own. My Mom is not here as she once was to cheer me on as I take my first steps or to hug me and dry my tears when I’m down and feeling blue.

As the days go on, I know that the dust will settle, and I will see all with a new perspective. It’s an interesting time as I begin to see my new place in the world. It’s a time for new understandings, new lessons, and new self discoveries.

This surely is a time like no other.

I love you Mom!

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Comments

  1. You are so beautiful. You will regain your balance. I promise. And through the whole process, I’ll be right there.

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