Actually, I should say that she found me. I had been scanning all of the cages, saying ‘hi’ to many sweet furry pups, but when I approached one particular cage, this cute furry ball came bounding toward the cage door as soon as she saw me. That was it. I was hooked…and so was she.

As we drove home that day to start our new life together, we were both beside ourselves with excitement. That was the beautiful beginning to an amazing relationship with one of the most special, loving animals I have ever known.

Sadly, we had our final drive together Wednesday night as I brought her to the vet to take her out of her pain and help her to move on to the next phase of her journey. As you have read in my previous posts, my dear sweet Pebbles had been attacked by what she called the cancer monster. We had chosen to have her left front leg amputated in December to keep her with us for as long as possible as she was still fully enjoying her life.  After the surgery she was doing so well–hopping around, eating up tons of chicken and carrots, and loving life. But then a couple of weeks ago I noticed that her breathing had changed. We visited our (amazing!) vet Dr. Jody and she took an x-ray of Pebbles chest. Unfortunately, the cancer had spread fully to her lungs. We knew then it was just a matter of time. So we just continued loving, playing, and having special treats and even more special moments.

She was such an amazing Warrior. So strong, never giving up until she just couldn’t stand on her own any more.  And even then she fought hard. She never whimpered, whined or complained once. She is my inspiration, my friend, my love, my hero. I still can’t believe she is no longer here.

She had a wonderful life filled with digging holes, chasing squirrels, hiking in the mountains of Massachusetts, California, and the red rocks of Sedona, dining on juicy carrots and tender chicken,  living in 4 states, helping to chase a bear up a tree, licking juice-stained roasting pans, being an older sister to two younger brothers she loved, experiencing the United States countryside as we drove 3000 miles across from East to West, walking in the desert, lying on the beach, playing with other dogs, puppies, and cats, swimming in a pond, getting groomed, being spoiled beyond belief, and being loved and cherished as the Queen that she was. She was Love personified.

I will never forget my special girl. She has touched many a heart, not just mine. She taught me to love deeply, to smile and laugh whenever possible, to find joy in everything and in every moment, and to never ever give up.

Here’s to you my beauty. I will love you forever.

Nothing seems to stop her from taking every advantage of finding joy in her life. One of the most amazing things I have seen is that her heart seems to have tripled in size. She was always a very sweet, loving dog, but lately there is a different look in her eyes when she gazes into mine. Maybe it’s gratitude or maybe it’s just pureness of love. Whatever it may be, it’s quite remarkable and totally melts my heart.

She is beauty and sweetness personified (or should I say dog-ified?). My life is richer and fuller for having made the choice that we made. And I think she is delighted too. As she said, “It’s just a leg anyway.”

If you want to follow Pebbles’ complete Adventure, just click HERE!

Right after Pebbles surgery (her one month “ampuversary” is tomorrow!) I had become obsessed with the fact that my beautiful dog, the one that I had known for 14 years with 4 legs, had changed. But after much suffering, I finally realized that I had been missing the fact that she’s still here with us, loving us and being in this world with us. I can still hug her and kiss her which I love to do. My lack of acceptance had taken me out of my present moment and living my life to the fullest. And how did I come to this realization? It was by observing Pebbles.

She had accepted it right away. It may have taken her a bit to figure out the new maneuvering she had to do to get about, but as far as she was concerned, it’s just a leg and now she just has a new way to walk and a new gait—actually she hops and moves now sometimes faster on 3 than she did on 4! So I thought, “Well, if she can accept it, why can’t I?”

What I discovered to be the biggest hindrance of my flowing with this drastic newness and change was my unwillingness to accept it. Newness and change is going on every moment of every day. It’s in small things like a new sweater you buy at the store and it’s in bigger things like births and deaths. Altering our reaction to change is the key for us to be able to deal with it when it shows up. If we don’t, it will be an uphill battle, and we will keep ourselves from fully living our lives.

So now I celebrate every moment I am with Pebbles and that she is here loving us. I look at the new way she moves and hops and stands with such great joy. And I can do that because I am totally accepting her newness; her new body.

I have decided to name this phenomenon of full acceptance of change and newness The Pebbles Principle. It’s when you fall into the full acceptance of change in your life.  I invite you to join me and use The Pebbles Principle as often as you can so that we can change our perceptions together and begin to see changes in our lives with new eyes… as I continue to celebrate the beauty of life with my special, amazing girl.

Pebbles at times moves faster now on three than she did on four! Her tail wags, her demeanor is as peaceful as ever, and I even think the carrots taste sweeter and juicier . How’s that for a rebound?

Life hasn’t changed at all. It’s still the same as it was before. To Pebbles it’s just a change in gait; a new stance. What a wonderful teacher she is to us all!

Most of the time now to protect her incision she sports her snazzy purple shirt from the Smith College Botanical Gardens that her Grama gave her. Here she is modeling her new wardrobe as she sleeps soundly after an exciting day of rides in the car, staple-removing, and lots of carrots, chicken, and biskees!

But frustration has a magic of its own. She finally got so frustrated that when I wasn’t looking, she got herself up on all three and when I did turn to see her, she was doing her beautiful hoppy-dance right toward me! She kept going all the way outside mostly on her own!

Frustration and complete focus on a goal can turn into action, success and, ultimately,  victory. Watching her makes me believe that all must be possible when one can garner her so-what-if-I only-have-three-legs-I-can-still-do-whatever-I have-to-do mindset.

She is still pretty wobbly, but her mostly solo foray was one of the most exquisite sights I have ever seen! The picture below may not seem the prettiest to you, but to us it is a thing of pure beauty…

So here she is perhaps dreaming of a romp with her new design…

Relaxing as a Tripawd

Who knew that having a tripod (or also lovingly called a “tripawd” at Tripawds.com ) would be like attending a personal development camp–a VERY  intense personal development camp. Thanks to Pebbs, I am getting real world experience flexing my personal evolution muscles.

As our adventure continues on Day Three*, the challenge also continues in encouraging her to increase her own strength and motivate her to get up and walk on her own. We had been using a towel–as we had researched- to act as a balancer once she is up on three legs. But Pebbles has a lovely quality of stubbornness, and no matter how much she has to “go”, she has not wanted to get up or accept any assistance from us whatsoever. She would cry and whine while making motions of trying to getting up, but when we would try to help her up, she would flop over on her back and side and become dead weight. This went on for some time, exhausting all 3 of us (and unnerving Pebbles’ brother Monty). Somehow we eventually got her up and outside, carrying her most of the way. Once we put her down in her usual spot, she soon lay down and the whole stubborn-refusal-to-allow-us-to-help act began all over again. The poor thing was so riddled with fear- something that gets in all of our ways when we  try to move forward, stopping us in our tracks, no matter how many appendages we have!

But after 30 minutes outside in the cold with worries of her lying on cold cement, I finally thought to myself–perhaps loudly enough so that she could hear– “you are just going to get up now whether you want to or not” and with a fierce determination lifted her up against all her snappy, whiny protests. We then scooped her up and carried her inside out of the cold.

Pebbles in her safe and comfy body pillow--gettin' ready to go for it!

But then, once inside, we were still faced with the dilemma of the fact that she had not done her business in over 48 hours. She began the whine song again and in a stroke of brilliance, Lennie thought to use a body pillow that we have as a support/sling so that she could feel more comfortable and not be in so much fear. She still fought us until I once again was flooded with pure determination to win over her stubbornness and fear and put her up on her feet no matter how hard she protested. This time we let her walk/hop out and about 20 minutes later she did what she had to do!

Maybe it’s also about being strong for our loved ones when they can’t be and they can’t see to the Truth of a situation. Once Pebbles was shown that there was no need to fear, she hopped along as best she could and began getting used to her new gait.

She also sees now that one doesn’t get a biskee for stubbornness– only for walking through fear with resolute determination and persistence. She is just so amazing. When I grow up, I hope I am half the Warrior Goddess that this sweet little being is!

*we are actually in Day Five of Pebbles New Adventure, but Tripawd Care doesn’t always afford time for blog posting!

Last night was her first foray outside to “take care of some business”. She resisted the need to go as she cried and barked. Every time we tried to help her up, she just flopped over on her side. Finally, when she just couldn’t take it any longer, she sat up on her own and pushed herself forward and got up enough for me to hoist her with her sling-towel and hold her up for a few steps, much on her own accord.  But I knew that she couldn’t make it all the way out and, unfortunately, Lennie and Monty (my boyfriend and Pebbles’ younger brother) had just gone for their own walk. So I some how picked up my 70 pound girl on my own and rushed outside with her and put her down near her favorite spot. There I witnessed true inspiration: she walked/hopped along, taking her first steps as a tripod with little help from me! It only lasted 4 or 5 hoppy steps, but it was a glorious sight!

She and I together, as we had sat inside the house just before the mad dash, had single minded focus: for her to get herself up and head straight for the door. We held that vision intently and let nothing else in. I know that’s what I did, and I am sure that’s all she could think and see herself.

It was an amazing victory. One that called for a handful of biscuits and a glass of delicious Christmas cordial. Here’s to you, Pebbs!

The surgery went well, finding that the cancer had not spread too much. Pebbles is so remarkable-she came home as a tripawd just 2 hours after the surgery and seems to be so relieved to have her sick leg gone. She’s taken a few steps on her own-I just support her with a towel as a sling right now- and her appetite for chicken and carrots (and anything else!) seems to have only increased! She is peaceful and happy and more filled with love than ever.

Thank you to all of you who have sent your love, prayers, and healing energy. We have a little work ahead of us, but being able to hold my girl in my lap and arms and look into her beautiful eyes makes my life more wonderful than ever!