Archive for the Acceptance Category

Embrace the New and ALL that It Brings

July 3rd, 2009 by Elizabeth

Something new; an exciting change; a complete alteration of the old. Refreshing, enlivening, uplifting. But with all of that excitement can come something else that we don’t fully expect. We can get blind-sided. Often what joins us on our transformational ride are feelings of loss and grief for what was left behind. That newness and Light can become a trigger for something not in our original game plan.

I came to this understanding first hand today. I have recently embarked on a new, exciting chapter in my life. On June 5th, I left my lovely little hometown of Easthampton, Massachusetts and drove across county with my two dear furry friends to join the love of my life in his home in California. Filled with excitement, bubbling about the change, and looking forward to the new, I was amazed to find the arrival of something else shortly after my arrival. Something underneath began brewing, and I didn’t like it. I didn’t understand it at the time, but it was my mind and body’s reaction and resistance to the drastic change. My “old” world and my “new” world couldn’t be more opposite. From the traffic to the scenery to my immediate surroundings to the people. On one level my mind craved familiarity and was completely resistant to the change. But today I finally understood that what was brewing underneath was the presence of a certain sadness that had been quietly running in the background and, until that moment, totally  perplexed me. I now saw that it was rising from a deep sense of loss. Perhaps a loss of the familiar, of certain day-to-day habits, of a particular way of seeing myself in the world.

Maybe that is why we don’t embark on those new projects or make the changes that, in the long run, would be for our own good. Perhaps the body senses the change, knows the upcoming challenges, and then we put on the brakes. We fear the possibility of experiencing loss of the familiar and choose to stay just where we are. It’s safer and not so scary.

Boldly going forward and making the changes that are the best for us takes a lot of courage. But it also takes love and devotion and gentleness with ourselves as we adjust.

With this new awareness, I will now embrace the feelings of loss and accept them all as part of the experience. That is the only way that I will be able to enjoy and appreciate the richness and fullness of my “new” life.

So I suggest that the next time you are faced with any offering of change- big or small- instead of turning away, acknowledge the fear and ensuing emotions and know that they are all part of the process—the process of truly LIVING; the process of truly BEING; the process of connecting to ALL THAT IS.

What if today was your last day?

March 26th, 2009 by Elizabeth

Quite the heavy question, don’t you think? I was quite surprised to hear the rock group Nickelback posing it to me. It’s so interesting where profundity lies…

So I thought about it. Have you? One of my favorite questions in the song is “Would you let anything get in your way?”. We do that, you know. We let things get in our way. And we are the creator of those obstacles. Don’t look elsewhere to place blame. I am willing to take the responsibility for my barriers to my in-the-moment discoveries of Truth. There is so often an excuse; a reason why we can’t; we are just too busy. Yes. Too busy to notice. Too busy to live the rising and setting of each incredible, colorful moment. Too busy to take the time to see what is really there. Maybe we’re too caught up in keeping up with the Joneses, lamenting over dropping stocks, or just complaining that it is raining or snowing yet again. Whatever it is, it is keeping us from living as though today is our last day.

I will be the first to admit that it is so very easy to get caught up in the 3-D. But that is such a small portion of our existence. An important part, but the grandness of What Really Matters is actually very invisible to the human eye. The heart knows it. The heart feels it. The heart is the connection to What Really Is. The heart will give you the answer to Nickelback’s question. And watch what happens when you come up with your answers. Magic occurs. For when you concentrate on the beauty of what is at the essence of your existence, what is really important, the flow of your life changes. Perhaps if we lived in and from a place that is connected to our Truth, that place of what-if-today-was-your-last-day, then life would no longer be “Oh yeah. It’s just my life. Big deal” but  “OH YEAH!! THIS IS MY LIFE AND IT IS A BIG DEAL!!!!”

So I challenge you to continually bring yourself back to each moment where you can Really and Truly live; in the moment as if it is the last. As if it is the first. As if it just is. And there you are in it.

Transformation is in the air, around the corner, in each moment, and even on the riff of a guitar. Check it out as Nickelback spells it out for us.

Are you studying?

January 28th, 2009 by Elizabeth

Accept what is. What you resist persists. Go with the flow.

Undoubtedly, most of us have heard one or all of these phrases. And they sound oh-so-great when you are sitting in the seminar room or with your fellow practitioners at a meditation sit or even as you pour over a Byron Katie book. But let’s be honest. You never fully understand those phrases until you get down and dirty in your own life and just experience first hand, putting all that learning to practice.

I have taken a lot of self development courses, but the one that I am presently enrolled in is by far the BEST I have ever taken. It is on-going. It is called “My Own Life”. Full enrollment began on October 20 1962 the second  I was born. Sometimes I am a bit perplexed as to why I would have registered for such a course. But the great thing is that the rest of the world is also enrolled in the same course at the same University: LifeU. Everyone has different curricula than I do, but some of us have similar professors, some of us prefer taking the tests without studying and going blindly into class, and some are even trying to cheat on their final exams. But we all answer to the Dean of the Universe. We can struggle and fight as we learn and move along toward Graduation Day, or we can quietly pull our chairs up to our desks and crack the books with honesty, integrity, courage, and a zest to learn.

Sharing our learnings is one of the neatest aspects of LifeU. Why not look to your classmates for assistance in cramming for that mid-term? So now, if you don’t mind, this classmate would like to share intimately with you what she learned while she got down and dirty in her studies this past weekend (this blog is G-rated, by the way, for any of you wondering about the “down and dirty” part…).

I have fairly recently closed the door on a traumatic, unhealthy relationship of 11 years and, as a result of that, I have entered a phase of renewing, blossoming,  learning the true meaning of self-love, and beginning to see the True Love that is Elizabeth.  Light is flooding my life with a gorgeous new relationship, I am selling my house, and my spiritual work has taken on new incredible and exciting dimensions. So much excitement, love, and light in my life! So here I am, just sailing along singing and laughing and then…do you hear that? Yup. That sound you hear is of that other shoe dropping.

Last Thursday I woke up with feelings of dread, loneliness, and despair, coupled with self-doubt and great feelings of self-hatred (and goodness knows what other darkness was thrown in there). Out of the blue. Nothing in particular had happened. Nothing that I could put my finger on at least. My lonely empty house felt to have doubled in size and the halls echoed with the sounds of my wailing as I felt the loneliness and trauma arise. My dogs ran to help, but their tender pawings at my body and kisses on my face did nothing to soothe me. The cold and the dark of the winter loomed and seemed to intensify all of the pain. I felt so removed and disconnected from the world. My boyfriend was working and on the other coast, adding to the isolation. The tears and the wailing went on into Friday and  Saturday. The fortunate thing was that I have been in similar classrooms before (with different teachers), and the pages of the book seemed familiar.

So what LifeU had previously taught me was to look at what it is that is coming up. Observe it. Then you will become separate from it and it will eventually dissolve. So I was aware and did that. The odd thing was that this time, the intensity was far greater than anything I had ever experienced. In those moments I could totally understand how some of our classmates ditch school and flunk out.

So at 4 AM on Sunday morning, as I lay crumpled face down on the floor, I experienced one of the biggest revelations of my life. In a moment of satori (instant enlightenment), I saw that I had been looking and observing the “crap”, the negative stuff coming up, but I realized that I had not been fully ACCEPTING it, and I was judging it for being there. The minute I accepted and stopped judging, even if it all didn’t make any sense, I  reconnected and felt peace. In that moment of exquisite realization, my teacher handed me my paper with a big A+ on it with a big gold star.

So you may be wondering why I could have all that stuff coming up if I am in such a joyous, love-filled place in my life. Here is exactly why: one of my glorious teachers, Sondra Ray, taught me that “Love brings up everything unlike itself for the purpose of healing”. So then  it is no wonder. With so much love in my life, there was no escaping this accelerated learning portion of my Life Course.

I highly recommend practicing the acceptance part. No matter how unpleasant or strange it may seem. Love it and embrace it. Fully and without reservation. Perhaps this can help us as the semesters  roll along. I personally want to go to the head of the class. I intend on graduating with the highest of honors. Maybe even with a Ph.D and summa cum laude…